


Front Row Seat

by JessJesstheBest



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Canon Compliant, Canon-typical swearing, I didn't even read this before posting it, M/M, POV Outsider
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-27 09:22:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12078207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessJesstheBest/pseuds/JessJesstheBest
Summary: Jenna didn’t have to know the men’s hockey team to know William Poindexter and Derek Nurse.





	Front Row Seat

Jenna knew the Samwell men’s hockey team.

Of course she did. Everyone did. But she especially did because she was on the Samwell _women’s_ hockey team.

She knew it wasn’t a phenomenon exclusive to the Samwell Women’s Hockey Team – the lack of recognition for female athletics. But the men’s hockey team were so especially over the top, most of Jenna’s classmates didn’t even know Samwell _had_ a women’s hockey team.

Jenna knew it wasn’t the team’s fault. When Jack Zimmermann had been captain, he’d been really good about scheduling ice time and showing up to home games when he could for support. The two captains after, Ransom and Holster, invited the team to every kegster. They invited the entire school so that wasn’t that big of a gesture but it was still nice to be recognized as a team. And Eric Bittle, the most precious bean Jenna had ever met, still sends them a couple pies every time they win a game.

They were good and kind dudes.

But they were absolutely ridiculous.

Jenna didn’t have to know the men’s hockey team to know William Poindexter and Derek Nurse.

“I’m just saying! How else do you explain an image without written alphabet conveying a singular message to tens of thousands of people?”

“Nurse, you’re not going to convince me memes are their own language, okay? You’re just not.”

“Where’s your sense of curiosity, Poindexter? Where’s your finesse?”

“I don’t know, where’s your chill, Nurse?”

Jenna bit her lip to keep from laughing. She didn’t need to turn around to see the scandalized look on Derek Nurse’s face.

It would have been so easy to resent SMH. They got all the glory, they got all the girls, and Jenna’s team worked just as hard as they did.

Instead, Jenna decided it would be healthier for her and more fun to instead choose to enjoy their antics. Especially since she had a front row seat to the world’s saltiest D-men.

Or, more of a third row seat. The row right in front of the row Nursey and Dex sat in, every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday in Pop Culture Theory.

Every day a new adventure.

 

_“I honestly can’t believe this.”_

_“Let it go Poindexter.”_

_“To hell with that, I need to bask in this.”_

_“Nothing to bask about, asshole, it’s not a big deal.”_

_“Not a big deal? Nursey,_ **_you have never read_ The Lord of the Rings**. _And I have! This is unprecedented.”_

_“Nice five dollar word there, book boy.”_

_“Oh, get fucked, Derek.”_

  


_“I’ll kill you, Nurse.”_

_“I don’t think you will. I do not think you’ll do that. Because you love me.”_

_“The Lord is testing me.”_

_“Will, what does that mean? Are you calling me the Lord? That is kind of you.”_

_“One more haiku, Nurse, I swear to God.”_

_“What is this I hear? Using the Lord’s name in vain? You bad Cath’lic boy.”_

_“_ **_Nurse._ ** _”_

 

 _“I’m not saying you’re sexist if you can’t acknowledge that_ Jessica Jones _is marvel’s best long form origin story, but why, William, do you hate women?”_

 _“I can’t believe you, of all people, are arguing with me about this. How could you not agree with me that_ Luke Cage _is the best?”_

_“Oh, what, because I’m part black?”_

_“Yes, as a matter of fact, and that’s not racist! That’s me acknowledging all that shit you’ve ever said about privilege and cultural oppression and recognizing the representation of that through_ Luke Cage _. The show is literally about a black man the police can’t gun down! You don’t appreciate that?”_

 _“Oh I can definitely appreciate that. That message is dope! And I think you’re mad woke for your active listening. But, just, in narrative framing and character arcs and visual story-telling,_ Jessica Jones _is leagues a-fucking-bove. Also her character is a nice subversion of traditional leading lady portrayals.”_

_“Yeah, no, she’s a badass.”_

_“For real. And at least we can agree they’re both better than fucking_ Iron Fist.”

_“Yeah, no, fuck that guy.”_

_“Heard.”_

 

Jenna’s favorite, though, happened on one of the last Wednesday classes before finals.

They weren’t already talking when they came in to take their usual seats. That wasn’t weird, they didn’t talk a lot of mornings. Jenna knew from word of mouth that their friendship was tenuous on the best of days so it made sense for them to keep quiet on some days.

No, the funny part – the amazing part – was after a good ten minutes of silence, thirty seconds before class was slated to begin, Jenna heard Nurse turn in his desk and casually ask, in a bored voice, apropos of _nothing_ , “So you want a blowjob after this?”

Jenna tried not to choke. She could not laugh. She could not let them know she listened in on them every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday,

But Poindexter just paused and then sighed really dramatically before saying “Yes.” As if Nursey was really putting him out by offering him a blowjob.

Jenna absolutely needed to excuse herself she was so in danger of laughing herself into a coma but just then class began so she had to quietly have a heart attack for the next 40 minutes.

 

Jenna was the only woman on her team completely unsurprised to see the D-Men making out against a wall at the next kegster.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first _Check Please_ fic! If I did well, please tell me, and if you thought it was terrible, _say nothing._
> 
> I'd like to thank [ this tumblr post ](http://saywhatjessie.tumblr.com/post/126316846320/animentality-fujoshicabal-my-fave-overheard) for the inspiration and the lawls.
> 
>  
> 
> [Rebloggable version](http://saywhatjessie.tumblr.com/post/165282024430/front-row-seat)


End file.
